LOS ANGELES–JoJo Siwa is an ICON. This will never NOT be true. She made waves by coming out as LGBTQ knowing her target audience is kids. She blazed trails with her designer, patterned button-downs. And she is the first and only Dancing with the Stars competitor and finalist to have a same-sex dance partner. So… Continue reading Lesbians Worldwide Call in Sick After JoJo Siwa Doesn’t Win Mirrorball Trophy
Let’s get it out of the way, you’re awful. But there’s still something we need from you: A collection of worlds from which to extend our leader’s empire in this Galaxy. Sancho Mu Arae e is also known as HD160691e, this planet is named after the character in the totally hot Don Quixote. Not to… Continue reading List: Let’s Just Say We’ll Be Impressed If You Conquer These Planets In The Name Of Our Space Emperor
LOS ANGELES–Following one of Bill Maher’s “New Rules” Segments, the entire Millennial Generation found themselves unable to argue against the comedian’s bulletproof logic and decided to descend into hedonism. Specifically, Maher’s observation that Greta Thunberg had fewer followers on social media than Kim Kardashian led a number of millennials determining that the environment was already… Continue reading Millennials Turn Against Environment At Bill Maher’s Urging
If there is one thing gay people definitely aren’t watching, it’s the CMA awards. This year, that’s unfortunate, because at the Country Music Awards featured a VERY IMPORTANT GAY KISS last week. And that kiss changed EVERYTHING, we guess! Here’s what went down at Wednesday’s ceremony: T.J. Osborne, of the Brothers Osborne, a band we… Continue reading BREAKING: Country Music Super Gay Now
SAN DIEGO – Last week, rumors were swirling that former Bachelorette Katie Thurston was making her stand-up comedy debut. Despite never once making a joke all season, Katie was often called “hilarious” by the eligible men competing in hopes of winning…her. In an article reported by Tvshowcase.com, we found video clips of Katie talking about… Continue reading Bachelorette Star Does Stand-Up Once, Ends Engagement
We at Queer Coded believe no topics should be off topic. Freedom of speech is of the utmost importance, in particular our right to say whatever the hell we want to say at any time. We are particularly fond of making fun of Caitlyn Jenner, despite being thoroughly tired of her. As such we would… Continue reading “All The Balls in the Manatee Pool” – Making Sure Everyone is Made Fun Of
OPINION- I am sick and tired of the stigma surrounding the Queer community! For too long, we’ve had to endure erasure and insulting assumptions. As a Queer Woman, let me be perfectly clear: my sexuality is not a mental disorder! I ignored my mental disorders for a lot longer than my sexuality. I am not… Continue reading If My Sexuality Were A Mental Disorder, I’d Have Ignored it Longer
HOLLYWOOD, CA – “Love is dead.” That’s what JoJo Siwa fans, aka Varsity Members of the J-Team, are Tweeting nationwide after learning that our beloved queer icon JoJo and her girlfriend, That One Chick, have broken up. We are in mourning. We are not well. The news is not hitting the LGBTQ community well, as… Continue reading JoJo Siwa Fans Heartbroken After Breakup with What’s-Her-Face
BANGOR, MN – After over a year of patiently waiting, fans of Succession, the hit HBO drama about awful, rich White people, gleefully watched the series’ third season premier Sunday night. Among those millions of eager viewers: lesbian couple and huge fans of the show, Connie Villanueva and Rom Sheldon. “We are obsessed,” Villanueva… Continue reading Queer Couple Watches “Succession,” Appropriating Straight Culture
DES MOINES, IA–Awaking to the crushing realization that even the best dreams are nightmares in disguise and there is no hope even in those hours of blissful slumber, 43-year-old Robert Forrester of Des Moines woke up last night to what most officials are calling the saddest dream ever and left him sobbing on the side… Continue reading Area Man Has, Like, The Saddest Dream Ever
