MILWAUKEE, WI–An associate editor of the news site Queercoded is in the hospital today after over-doing it with Ben & Jerry’s Cookie Dough Bites. The bites are pieces of the cookie dough commonly used in the famous pair’s ice cream, but sold individually in the frozen section. The editor in question is believed to have… Continue reading Queercoded Editor Overdoses on Ben & Jerry’s Cookie Dough Bites
TALLAHASSEE, FL- Citing unfair biological advantages, Tallahassee dork, Mildred Van Snoot has petitioned the state legislature to ban coordinated students from competitive sports. “My daughter has missed out on important athletic scholarships, scholarships that would have changed her life, based solely on her inability to run in a straight line, throw a ball, or stand… Continue reading Dweeb Moves to Ban Athletes From Competition
BURLINGTON, VT–After saying something that she thought to be profound, a local woman has found herself refuted by science. Trans Woman, Ashley Smith, stated on social media that, “Being trans is the least interesting thing about me.” Two hours later, her statement was refuted by a scientist who had submitted her findings to the prestigious… Continue reading Trans Woman: “Being Trans Is Least Interesting Thing About Me.” Scientists: “Not So Fast.”
Sandie Brown is fierce. They are political. They are mean. They are sick with some sniffles. The non-binary, queer activist is always ready to take on any fight that presents itself against the LGBTQIA+ community. Nothing gets in the way of Sandie’s righteous anger and fury…except for a wicked case of post-nasal drip. “I just… Continue reading Sinus Infection Turns Badass Queer Activist into Sad Lil Baby
Catastrophic Drop In Gay in 2021 CHICAGO–Judging by the pride parade this year in Chicago, the amount of Gay in the United States has not stopped its previous ascent, but the numbers tell a different story. The level of Gay has dropped to below 2008 levels in the past year, mostly accounting to the Coronavirus… Continue reading BY THE NUMBERS: Gay Hits Decade Low Due To Coronavirus
NEW MEXICO- Billionaire entrepreneur Sir Richard Branson and six others died earlier today when Virgin’s VSS Unity exploded moments after launch in a failed attempt to go into space. The space ship was supposed to travel through space for 9 minutes before returning to Earth, but an apparent problem with the cup holders not being… Continue reading Richard Branson Dies in Fiery Explosion
OMAHA, NE — Recovering from a significant amount of stuffing loss, 35-year-old Theodore “Teddy” Ruxpin detailed his accident involving large agricultural machinery that happened last Tuesday. “It hurts,” he said, rubbing his paw on one of the 34 separate stitches now holding his stuffing in, “I’ve been working, ya know. Odd jobs. This one comes in.… Continue reading Teddy Ruxpin Who Survived Corn Detasseler Accident Describes Ordeal
Think about it, there are some people that are not really into people. They say they are happiest alone or with a book. But are they really? If they read so much, don’t they see that the Internet is full of articles about how to not be so introverted. There is no helping them. Can… Continue reading Extroverted? Here’s 6 Tips on Pretending to be Quiet and Reflective
YOUR BEDROOM- Look, we need to have a discussion. This is becoming a problem. But everyone you meet cannot simply just secretly an egg, (how closeted transgender people are sometimes referred to). I know it’s tempting to see signs of gender non-conformity in all those that you meet, but it’s simply statistically unlikely that everyone… Continue reading Not Everyone Is Secretly Trans
Forgot long haired Chihuahuas that get nervous and pee all the time, these pets will perfectly complement your alternative lifestyle. 10. BeesYes, they can sting and be difficult to love, but who isn’t these days? 9. Emotional Support Bearded DragonsLike lizards in cute vests, and need help with your anxiety? Want to come out as… Continue reading Top Ten Gayest Pets
