INDIANAPOLIS, IN–Following a particularly egregious display of homophobic behavior, local woman Trina Holland declined to go to Human Resources to report the incident. “I know I should, but I don’t want to rock the boat,” she said while she took down a photo of her and her wife on their honeymoon from her cubicle.… Continue reading Half Of LGBT Workforce Faced Discrimination, Other Half Don’t Want To Rock Boat
AUSTEN, TX- Local right-wing radio listeners this evening are mourning the loss of radio personality Stanley “Shoot ‘Em Up” Simmons, who died of Covid. He follows a string of other prominent conservative voices, who have railed against Covid precautions and are dying at an alarming rate. “All according to plan,” states liberal strategist Serena Munson.… Continue reading Liberal’s Nefarious Pandemic Plot Going to Plan
Not but just a few years ago, the LGBTQ Community had to hide who they were at all times. But now, we have a multitude of holidays that appeared to pop up out of nowhere for the sake of a Facebook post, such as the recently celebrated “Non-Binary Day” and yesterday, National Coming Out Day!… Continue reading This National Coming Out Day, American Queers Stayed Inside En Masse
BEVERLY HILLS, CA- A month after Caitlyn Jenner lost her bid for governor of California, Queer Coded editors notice that, well, Caitlyn Jenner lost her bid for governor of California a month ago. “No one’s really surprised she lost,” says Californian political pundit Jay Munsey. “Who even supported her? Not pro-trans people, not anti-trans people.… Continue reading Jenner’s Gubernatorial Hopes Go Down In Flames; No One Cares
WASHINGTON D.C.–Announcing that nothing will ever get better, Senate and House Democrats have announced that their agenda was implemented as they had envisioned. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said at a press conference, “We have reached our goals and we are proud to announce that we have disappointed America yet again. It was a smashing success!… Continue reading “Vote Blue No Matter Who” A Smashing Success At Disappointing Democratic Voters
The Tony Awards, the ceremony for excellence on Broadway, is arguably the fourth gayest event of the year. Behind only Pride, Halloween, and Drag Race Finale night, gays across the country….nay, the world, gather in front of their TVs to watch a variety of song-and-dance routines to make the gays feel GAY! The happy kind!… Continue reading CONGRATS! Non-binary Erasure Wins a Tony!
EVANSTON, IL- Local leftist high schooler Allisa Lawrence has lately been giving her unvaccinated family members earfuls about “trusting in science,” encouraging them to get over their “irrational” beliefs and just get the shot for fuck’s sake. She continuously posts links to numerous scientific studies on Facebook that she may or may not have read… Continue reading “Trust in Science,” says Leftist who knows little about Science
Location and overview of Tall el-Hammam. Via Nature. TALL EL-HAMMAM, JORDAN–A recent study published in the journal Nature supposes that the site of the ancient city of Sodom was not destroyed by an almighty and angry God. Archeologists posit that the city was instead flattened by an air-burst similar to the Tunguska event and that… Continue reading Sodom Destroyed By Possibly Homosexual Meteor
CINCINNATI, OH- Citing several popular YouTube channels, a group of surgeons known as Committee of MedICal Surgeons Against Nose Suffocation have come out against wearing face masks while performing the most difficult of procedures. “Surgeons have been safely performing surgeries for years while wearing masks, but with all these self-appointed experts who can’t handle wearing… Continue reading Mask-Free Operating Rooms Coming Soon?
SYRACUSE, NY–A vast amount of manure was discovered spread across three blocks of the Skunk City neighborhood of Syracuse. Due to the large amount of methane such manure releases, the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) was invited to investigate. The agency reports that this toxic level of bullshit is directly related to a story about who… Continue reading EPA Reports Toxic Levels Of Bullshit Due To Story About Who Richard Was With Last Night
